Can you beleive it.?

just had to send this too you - hysterical!! No wonder I still shave


%26gt; my legs......!


%26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Only a woman can laugh at this. No one else would


%26gt; dare! Hope you


%26gt; enjoy!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; This has to be one of the funniest and most awful


%26gt; scenarios I have


%26gt; ever


%26gt; %26gt; heard of... Bless this woman!!!


%26gt; %26gt; All hair removal methods have tricked us with their


%26gt; promises of easy,


%26gt; %26gt; painless removal. The epilady, scissors, razors,


%26gt; Nair and now.... The


%26gt; %26gt; Wax!!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; My night began as any other normal weekday night.


%26gt; Come home; fix


%26gt; %26gt; dinner; played with the kids. I then had the thought


%26gt; that would ring


%26gt; %26gt; painfully in my mind for the next few hours; 'Maybe


%26gt; I should do the


%26gt; hair


%26gt; %26gt; removal thing for the month?'


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; So I headed to the site of my demise; the bathroom.


%26gt; It was one of


%26gt; those


%26gt; %26gt; cold wax kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you


%26gt; just rub the strips


%26gt; %26gt; together in your hand and then they get warm and you


%26gt; peel them apart,


%26gt; %26gt; press it to your leg (or wherever else) and hair


%26gt; comes right off! No


%26gt; %26gt; mess, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm no


%26gt; girly, girl, but am


%26gt; %26gt; mechanically inclined enough that I can figure it


%26gt; out.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; *YA THINK!!!*


%26gt; %26gt; So I pull one of the thin strips out. It's two


%26gt; strips facing each


%26gt; %26gt; together, stuck together. Instead of rubbing them


%26gt; together, I get out


%26gt; %26gt; the hairdryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. Cold wax


%26gt; my rear end (Oh,


%26gt; how


%26gt; %26gt; this phrase haunts me!).


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin


%26gt; around it tight and


%26gt; %26gt; pull. OK... So it wasn't the best feeling, but it


%26gt; wasn't too bad. I


%26gt; can


%26gt; %26gt; do this!!! Hair removal no longer eludes me!! I am


%26gt; She-Ra, fighter of


%26gt; %26gt; all wayward body hair and smooth skin


%26gt; extraordinaire!!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; With my next wax strip, I move 'north'. After


%26gt; checking on the kids, I


%26gt; %26gt; sneak back into the bathroom for the ultimate hair


%26gt; fighting


%26gt; %26gt; championship. I drop my panties and place one foot


%26gt; on the toilet.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip


%26gt; across the right side


%26gt; %26gt; of the bikini line, covering the right half of my


%26gt; vagina and


%26gt; stretching


%26gt; %26gt; down to the inside of my butt cheek (Yes, it was a


%26gt; long strip). I


%26gt; inhale


%26gt; %26gt; deeply and brace myself....


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; RRRRIIIIIIPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!


%26gt; %26gt; I'm Blind!!!!! Blinded from pain!!!!!!... OH DEAR


%26gt; GOD !!!!!!!!!!! I'm


%26gt; %26gt; making noises that only dogs can hear.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Vision slowly returning, I notice that I've only


%26gt; managed to pull off


%26gt; %26gt; half of the strip. S**T!!! Another deep breath and


%26gt; RRIIPP...


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Everything is swirly and spotted . I cannot breath


%26gt; or speak - I have


%26gt; %26gt; forgotten how ..


%26gt; %26gt; Do I hear crashing drums?????


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Wait a few minutes and I'm back to normal (nearly)


%26gt; After all this I


%26gt; %26gt; want to see my trophy !!! - A wax covered strip with


%26gt; my hairy pelt


%26gt; that


%26gt; %26gt; has caused me so much pain, sticking to it. I want


%26gt; to revel in the


%26gt; glory


%26gt; %26gt; that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the


%26gt; strip!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; There's no hair on it! Where is the hair?? WHERE IS


%26gt; THE WAX? Slowly I


%26gt; %26gt; ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet.


%26gt; I see the


%26gt; hair...


%26gt; %26gt; The hair that should be


%26gt; %26gt; on the strip. I touch. I am touching wax. S**T!!! I


%26gt; run my fingers


%26gt; over


%26gt; %26gt; the most sensitive part of my body, which is now


%26gt; covered in cold wax


%26gt; and


%26gt; %26gt; matted hair.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Then I make the next BIG mistake . . . . . .


%26gt; %26gt; Remember, my foot is still propped up on the toilet.


%26gt; I know I need to


%26gt; %26gt; do something, so I put my foot down. DAMN!!! I hear


%26gt; the slamming of


%26gt; the


%26gt; %26gt; cell door. Vagina? Sealed shut! Butt?? Sealed


%26gt; shut!!!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; I penguin walk around the bathroom, trying to figure


%26gt; out what to do


%26gt; and


%26gt; %26gt; think to myself, 'Please don't let me get the urge


%26gt; to poop. My head


%26gt; may


%26gt; %26gt; pop off.'


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the


%26gt; hottest water I can


%26gt; %26gt; stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax


%26gt; covered bits and the


%26gt; wax


%26gt; %26gt; should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right??


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; WRONG!!!! I get in the tub - The water is slightly


%26gt; hotter than then


%26gt; %26gt; that used to


%26gt; %26gt; torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical


%26gt; equipment - I sit.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Now, the only thing worse that having your nether


%26gt; businesses glued


%26gt; %26gt; together is having them glued together and then


%26gt; glued to the bottom


%26gt; of


%26gt; %26gt; the tub.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; In scalding hot water!! (Which, by the way, doesn't


%26gt; melt cold wax)


%26gt; So,


%26gt; %26gt; now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub!!! God bless


%26gt; the man what


%26gt; %26gt; convinced me I should have a phone in the


%26gt; bathroom!!! I call my


%26gt; friend,


%26gt; %26gt; thinking surely she's waxed before and has come


%26gt; secret of how to get


%26gt; me


%26gt; %26gt; undone. It's a very good conversation starter, 'So


%26gt; my butt and who-ha


%26gt; %26gt; are stuck to the bottom of the tub!' There is a


%26gt; slight pause. She


%26gt; %26gt; doesn't have a secret trick, but does try to hide


%26gt; the laughter from


%26gt; me.


%26gt; %26gt; She wants to know exactly where the wax is located.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; 'Are we talking buttock cheek or is it covering -


%26gt; you know -


%26gt; %26gt; Everywhere(cringe factor 20000 at this point)?'


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I


%26gt; give her the


%26gt; rundown


%26gt; %26gt; and she suggests I call the number on the side of


%26gt; the box.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; I should be the 'butt' of someone else's work-night


%26gt; jokes. While we


%26gt; go


%26gt; %26gt; through various solutions, I resort to scraping the


%26gt; wax off with a


%26gt; %26gt; razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie


%26gt; goodies covered


%26gt; in


%26gt; %26gt; hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot


%26gt; water, and then


%26gt; dry


%26gt; %26gt; shaving the sticky wax off!!!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; By now, the brain is not working, dignity has taken


%26gt; a major hike and


%26gt; I


%26gt; %26gt; slip into glazed donut land. My friend is still


%26gt; talking with me and


%26gt; my


%26gt; %26gt; hand reaches towards the saving grace...The lotion


%26gt; they give you to


%26gt; %26gt; remove the excess wax.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; What do I really have to lose at this point. I rub


%26gt; some on and OH MY


%26gt; %26gt; GOD!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids, scared


%26gt; the dickens out of


%26gt; my


%26gt; %26gt; friend, but I really don't care!!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; 'IT WORKS!! IT WORKS!!' I get a hearty


%26gt; congratulation from my friend


%26gt; %26gt; and she hangs up. I successfully remove the


%26gt; remainder of the wax and


%26gt; %26gt; then notice, to my grief and despair...


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; THE HAIR IS STILL THERE... ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; So, I shaved it off. Heck, I'm numb at this point.


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt;


%26gt; %26gt; Next week I'm going to try hair colour . . . . .


%26gt; %26gt;

Can you beleive it.?
this has been around a while--in fact, it was just posted a few weeks ago. Please no one think it really happened to the poster!
Reply:Eh !!!!!LOl





What I would like to know is will you be using veet from now on.:o)
Reply:omg that is horrible! I feel bad for laughing!
Reply:lol
Reply:that's the funniest thing i've ever read!!!!
Reply:I WOULD LEAVE THE HAIR DYE FOR A YEAR IF I WERE YOU AND THEN GET A PRO TO DO IT POOR OL YOU
Reply:very amusing ..........you're lucky you didn't pull your innards out
Reply:Uh... wow... obviously I'm not a girl but your story rendered me speechless... I got a shaving nik on my chin this morning if that helps? You poor girl...
Reply:am so SO sticking to a salon! (pardon the pun!!)
Reply:thats brilliant! haha... i had a good laugh... i shall remain a wax virgin ive decided! lol
Reply:pmsl! dontcha just love these sorta stories!


heres some 'moments' from the people in my family.,..


my aunt once put her 'towel' on her underwear the wrong way around! - major pain apparently lol


my cousin once stuck all the 'airplane stickers' to the bedroom window - the ones usually located in the bathroom - haha!


my mother once walked out of the public loos in the town centre with her skirt tucked into her knickers!
Reply:Later that night the lady's lover commented that she should be a bit more diligent when removing her pubic hair and that is why the poor girl is on the manslaughter charge.
Reply:wooooooooooooooooooooooooow!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:hehe.. that was quite funny... and actually reminded me of my first 'at home bikini waxing strips'. I have a blood disorder and so have to take a blood thinner every day, and as I pulled the first strip of my lady garden, none of the hair came off with it, I shrieked, then I bled, and then I was left wit a swollen, bruised front bum for a couple of days! I'd luckily only put one strip on so I didn't have to go through the pain of pulling off the other side!





Since then, its hair removal cream all the way! Nair has been my god send!
Reply:lmao. nice one.
Reply:lol! let us know what colour you dye you are going to use ;o)
Reply:Ahahah....aww im p!ssing myself, but atleast we all know now what we shouldnt do ;]
Reply:OMG im still laughting totaly hilarious
Reply:0mg. wow.. extremely painful. =[
Reply:LMAO that is so funny!!!!! Yeah I wonder how that hair color is going to turn out lol!!!
Reply:Just shave it!!!! Mach 3, good shaving gel, and then use Jergens Naturally Smoot Hair minimzing lotion twice a day.





Smooth is good, but getting there, and remaining there, should not be painful.





Hope this helps.